Who hasn't been frustrated at work at some point in their career? Some people deal with it better than others. I have always admired the blithe employee that can go about their day without any sign of irritation. I am unfortunately not one of those people. At the age of 32 I thought I was having a heart attack at work. A searing pain gripped my heart and frightful memories of my dad who had a heart attack just a few years back filled my head. Panic set in. In just a few minutes after my manager called an ambulance, some EMT's rushed up to my cube. After they carelessly cut off my shirt in front of all my co-workers, one of them loudly asked if I had taken any Viagra in the last 48 hours - which I hadn't. He then gave me some pill then I was placed on a gurney and rushed to the hospital.

At the hospital shirtless, I went through a litany of tests to determine the source of my chest pain. The tests came back and showed that nothing was wrong at all with my heart or health. After retracing my day I focused on two things that I now believe to be the causes. The first was the spicy meatball sub that I had consumed rapidly during a short lunch break. The second, and more significant, was the building up of frustration over the seemingly petty chores and meaningless tasks I was assigned to complete every day. Delving further into the latter, I started to feel the emotions that overtook me when my manager would kick reports back with trivial corrections and comments. I realized that stress and frustration were getting the best of me and I needed an outlet. A short time later I wrote Please Micro-Manage Me, and Office Poetry was born.

I have always subscribed to the philosophy that "when life hands you lemons, make lemonade." This philosophy is alluded to in the poem, Office Poetry, and it was my saving grace. As a student and young man I wrote poetry to release my thoughts and feelings about different topics. It was a catharsis that I used at certain times of happiness, stress, sadness, and various other emotional states. It dawned on me one day, that the best way to deal with my frustration at work, rather than stuff it inside and suffer another violent acid reflux episode, or yell at my boss and risk getting fired, was to write funny poems about it.

Work provided me a plethora of material. It seemed every day would bring forth a new topic to ridicule in verse. Before long I had amassed a collection of these poems and they began to circulate throughout the office providing comic relief to other co-workers, and friends. Not to my surprise my fellow co-workers suffered from many of the same frustrations at work as I did and thus the poems had wide appeal. At times I could hear people laughing out loud in their cubes after one of my poems was pulled up from their inboxes and read. It gave me great pleasure in helping other co-workers escape the stress and boredom of the day with a quick, hilarious poem that let them know that they were not alone, that we were all in this rat race together.

So after several years of writing and reciting these poems to my friends, wife, and co-workers I decided to publish them in a book devoted entirely to office related humor in poetic form. I could think of no better title than Office Poetry. I hired a talented illustrator, Mark Sean Wilson, to draw the images I had in mind for selected poems. I wanted Office Poetry to be like one of my favorite books, Where the Sidewalk Ends, by Shel Silverstein, but for working adults. After numerous revisions and editing I finally sculpted each poem to say exactly what I felt and saw at the office. While the rhymes weaved in out of each stanza I also infused some of my own advice and wisdom collected over the 15+ years of working for Fortune 500 companies and experiencing the hectic pace of the daily grind.

As I was finishing the book, and reciting the poems to anyone who would listen, people would tell me that they enjoyed hearing me recite the poems even more than reading them themselves. I hatched the idea of making Office Poetry into a performance. Being a musician and songwriter, I noticed that several of the poems had a melodic flow to them that could be easily transformed into a song. So I began writing the music. Growing up in the MTV generation I was entertained by comic songwriters and their funny absurd music videos. I also absolutely loved Spinal Tap. So although the lyrics were satirical, the music was written to move people, jam-out, and be good enough to stand on its own. I call it "mock rock". But when you are in front of a crowd you need video. So I put together a rough script and some actors and filmed scenes to coincide with the lyrics of each song. Thus Office Poetry Live! contains live recitation of selected poems and original music and videos that provide over an hour's worth of hilarious office humor that is sure to entertain even the most complacent employee.

So comrades, Office Poetry is for you. It is intended to provide a quick laugh and also insightful wit into the dynamic environment of the corporate working world. Whether you read the book, buy the DVD or CD, or come to a live show, you should feel that cathartic effect that I felt when I was writing each poem that only comes with a good laugh at a stressful situation. Enjoy!

Robert Petta

Author, Creator, and Performer of Office Poetry

Office Poetry is published by Light Underground Publishing. It is a copyright protected work and the creator Robert Petta urges you to buy a copy for yourself or a friend or send them a link to the website if you would like to share it. Please do not duplicate these poems or distribute in any form without the written consent of Robert Petta. Remember, you not only are stealing from the creator, but hurting the charities that could benefit from each additional person who buys an Office Poetry product. The author and the charities thank you for supporting Office Poetry and their noble causes with your purchase. Please do not disseminate these poems without the expressed written permission from the author.